I just recently came face-to-face with getting older, and I didn’t like it one bit.
With every passing birthday I was aware I was getting older; I just never felt or thought I was. I mean, getting old was what happened to other people, like my husband and my sisters, for example.
Of course, there was that grey hair I found a year ago. But that was easily sorted out with a good tug. Then the wrinkles came, but hallelujah for high-definition makeup, retinol and really expensive eye creams.
I could also ignore the aches that weren’t there in my body 10 years ago, as well as the declining energy levels (I chalked this up to learning how to relax, something that is recommended for us high-stung Type As).
But recently something happened that I could no longer ignore, or buy a cream to correct, or even drink my delusions away over.
I started menopause.
At first I was in complete denial. How much denial, you’re wondering? Epic levels, let me tell you.
One evening I internalized this change in my body when I couldn’t sleep. (Middle-aged women don’t really sleep, we “drift” through the night.)
I got myself so worked up about my lack of menstrual cycle that I was convinced this was not menopause. It had to be something else. I was far too young for menopause. This only happened to other women. Older women.
The thought of this not being menopause, and instead the alternative, was frightening to the bone and I could not keep this to myself any longer. I had to wake up loving husband and let him in on my epiphany.
Now, ladies, I have a tip for you. If you want to freak your significant other out, wake them up in the middle of the night and tell them you think you’re pregnant. Works better than a bucket of cold water to the face.
The next day I ended up in a local pharmacy, incognito, buying a home pregnancy test.
I came home and found out that I tested positive... for menopause.
Lucky for me, this past last year I have been designing programs and plans specific for menopausal women. I have had the fortune of interviewing some of the industry’s best about how to handle menopause, so I knew what I needed to do to help control my weight, my hot flashes, my sleeping problems, my brain fog and my turn-on-a-dime moods.
What none of these experts taught me, however, was how to handle this change emotionally. Because that was where menopause was really kicking me in the butt.
And then I got to thinking (again when I couldn’t sleep, because those are the best times to think, aren’t they?) Menopause is just another cog in the wheel of this thing called life.
I started relating to it by thinking of it in terms that I knew and could understand, such as working out, and came to the conclusion that menopause is just another rep in the workout of life.
Just like any other rep that I do in the gym, I can perform it poorly and set myself up for injury, I can do the rep half-hearted and see little to no results, or I can put all of my effort and focus on this one rep and grow. The only difference is that it’s not physically in this instance; instead, I’ll grow emotionally and spiritually.
So, here I am putting all my energy into this rep and finding out that I don’t mind the burn or the short-term pain because in the end I plan on coming out of this a better woman.
PJ Wren is a local personal trainer and writer in the Delta area who can be found kicking menopause’s butt on her blog and YouTube channel. www.fitnesswithpj.com/blog.
