Looking after a family member with a terminal illness and coping with their death puts a huge amount of stress on the family system. Any loss within a family will undoubtedly affect others.
When families are in crisis, they may feel imprisoned by the disease process, as though their real lives are suspended by the looming, all-consuming presence of illness and dying.
Some say when one person in the family has cancer, the whole family has cancer. This may not be literally true, but what is true is the impact of illness and the impact of grieving echoes throughout the entire family.
The process of adjusting to such an event can have both negative and positive outcomes. However, there is often a lengthy period of adjustment as family members navigate the transition of a loss that impacts everybody as individuals and the dynamic of the family as a whole.
At Delta Hospice Society's Centre for Supportive Care in Ladner, the goal is to provide the support and tools to help individuals and families meet the ever-changing and complex needs that are characteristic of this experience.
Counsellors endeavour to respect and restore people's sense of control and selfconfidence.
Families have come to this illness from lives already filled with challenges and triumphs and the wisdom and knowledge gained from those past experiences will be a great
help through this time.
Coping tends to be much better in families who are more cohesive, more open with emotional sharing, more supportive to each other, have more external support (friends/extended family) and are more active in problem-solving.
However, even in "healthy" families, communication around illness, loss and grief experiences can be very difficult. Typically, family members tend to protect one another and are reluctant to share their pain. There are many different grieving styles and responses within a family and it is rare for everyone to be on the same page.
Children, in particular, have different ways of coping with loss and grief than adults. A child's response to grief is intimately intertwined with their family's response to grief.
Programs at the Harold & Veronica Savage Centre for Supportive Care offer a family-centered approach to care. Central to this approach are the principles of viewing the patient within the context of his/her family, empowering families, providing social supports, building relationships with families, building communication skills and maintaining effective communication. In a family-centered model of care, professionals work collaboratively with families to address their loved one's needs.
For more information about the family centered programs offered at the Centre for Supportive Care, call 604-948-0660.
