Now that I've got a pretty good handle on how 2015 will unfold given we're already a day-and-a-half in, I offer these fearless predictions, in no particular order, for the year ahead:
Jim Cessford, who will retire in early 2015 after two decades as Delta's police chief, soon finds himself bored in retirement so he decides to test the department's much ballyhooed no-calltoo-small policy.
The good news is that officer response is swift; the even better news is the neighbour's dog agrees to abide by the restraining order and vows to stop fertilizing Cessford's lawn.
By mid-June Lois Jackson makes a public appeal for the return of the mayor's chain of office. In a carefully-worded statement that takes pains not to point any fingers, a clearly perturbed Jackson reveals it's the fourth chain to go missing in the last six months. In an unrelated story, several councillors are simultaneously seen furiously deleting images from their iPhones.
It takes just three hours and 15 minutes after the initial community mailbox is installed in Ladner for the first letter to the editor to be penned decrying a decaying of society. Interestingly, the letter doesn't mention theft, vandalism, inconvenience or litter, but rather rages about the creepy guy down the block using the mailbox as a pick up spot. Apparently what's your sign has been replaced by small talk about the specials in the Little Caesars flyer.
Delta is the only area in the Lower Mainland to reject the idea of a Metro Vancouver Congestion Improvement Tax in a spring referendum. TransLink officials are outraged by the audacity of local voters and look to exact revenge on the community by cutting back on its transit services, only to find out they've already done that.
A petition is presented to Delta council calling for legislation that would automatically make all dust found within municipal limits the responsibility of the coal port operator.
Proponents claim not only would such a bylaw do away with costly testing that proves otherwise, but it would also force Westshore Terminals to establish a Patio Enhancement Team.
After Whatcom County once again rejects the radio towers proposal, the applicant decides to look north in the hopes of finding a land-rich, cash-poor partner. Unable to choose between two excellent candidates, the broadcaster eventually asks the school district and health authority to settle it with a best-ofseven game of Rock, Paper, Scissors.
